So the Thomas Tuchel era has officially begun, and true to form, it started not with a polished press conference but with a flickering screen, a glitc...
So the Thomas Tuchel era has officially begun, and true to form, it started not with a polished press conference but with a flickering screen, a glitching microphone, and the distinct sound of Harry Maguire's mum throwing a wobbly on social media. Welcome to English football, Thomas. You wanted the job Here is the full, unfiltered version of what you signed up for.Let's put the theatre to one side for a moment. Because once you get past the FA's tech team failing to launch their own presentation in front of a live audience, and the obligatory outrage over a player who has spent the last eighteen months struggling to trap a bag of cement, the actual squad Tuchel has put together is rather good. The kind of good that stands up to proper scrutiny. Every pick, every omission, makes sense when you think about the specific demands of international tournament football. He hasn't just picked the eleven most famous names. He has picked a team with tactical flexibility, a side that can sit in a low block when required and burst into transitional play the moment the opposition loses concentration.What is most refreshing about this selection, and about Tuchel's general demeanour since his unveiling, is the quiet indifference to the wider shout verse. He does not care about the noise. He does not care which former player with a podcast is furious that a certain left back has been overlooked. He has looked at the data, he has watched the tape, and he has arrived at a conclusion based on what he sees in training and in the heat of a Premier League match. That is how a professional operates. That is a far more accurate definition of Englishness than the performative patriotism Sir Gareth occasionally trotted out. Because if there is one thing this country understands, it is that nothing ever bleeding well works around here, and Tuchel seems to understand that the only way to make things work is to ignore the people promising tech based solutions for things that don't really need a solution, and to focus on the football.Of course, the mother of Harry Maguire is extremely upset. That is her right. But let's be honest: if we are judging a squad by how many mums are happy, we might as well just pick the under 15s school team. Maguire has been a fine servant, but his form has dropped off a cliff. Football is brutal. International football is even more brutal. Tuchel has made a call based on current sharpness, not reputation. That is the sign of a manager who knows he will be judged on results, not on sentiment. The journey begins now. A journey into fantasy, joy, and beer thrown in the air. A journey into issues of identity and national character. But most importantly, a journey into a squad that looks like it actually has a plan. For the first time in a while, that feels like enough.
